{"id":137,"date":"2024-06-27T12:30:41","date_gmt":"2024-06-27T12:30:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/friscotimes.org\/?p=137"},"modified":"2024-06-27T12:30:41","modified_gmt":"2024-06-27T12:30:41","slug":"antwone_fisher_shared_his_struggles_from_childhood_to_manhood_at_family_compass_north_star_luncheon-html","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/friscotimes.org\/?p=137","title":{"rendered":"Antwone Fisher Shared His Struggles From Childhood To Manhood At Family Compass’ North Star Luncheon"},"content":{"rendered":"


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For guests arriving for the VIP at \u201ca local country club\u201d for Family Compass<\/a>\u2019 North Star Luncheon, things were a bit confusing on Monday, April 29. Instead of being directed to the north driveway, where valets typically would relieve guests of their wheels, no one was there. Horrors! Whatever were the guests to do? Some wondered if it had been a cost-saving decision to do-it-yourself park? No matter. The early morning\u2019s fog had been dismissed by sunshine and guests ambled on stiletto heels to the club\u2019s Founder\u2019s Room.<\/p>\n

But as it turned out, the valets had been stationed at the east entrance and looked a bit forlorn as familiar license plates headed to the do-it-yourself, with drivers and their passengers bypassing the complimentary services.<\/p>\n

It was only then, after the event organizers and the valet team compared notes, that the car parkers headed north.<\/p>\n

In the meantime, Family Compass CEO Ona Foster<\/strong>, VIP sponsor Mary Bowman Campbell<\/strong>, Event Co-Chairs Neda Bahramnejad <\/strong>and Vanessa Fuquay<\/strong> and Honorary Chair Helen Holman<\/strong> greeted guests like Rosewood Foundation\u2019s Lynn Fisher<\/strong>, 2023 North Star Luncheon Co-Chairs Brooke Bailey <\/strong>and Elizabeth Dacus<\/strong>, Jimmy Heinpel<\/strong> and Tiffany Divis<\/strong> for the first hour.<\/p>\n

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Jimmy Heinpel and Mary Bowman Campbell<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
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Helen Holman and Lynn Fisher<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
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Brooke Bailey, Vanessa Fuquay, Neda Bahreamnejad and Elizabeth Dacus<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
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Antwone Fisher and Richardson\u2019s Kappa Delta alumnae<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Right on cue, the man-of-the-hour\/best-selling author\/keynote speaker Antwone Fisher<\/strong><\/a> arrived and chatted with guests and accommodated all for photo opps, including the Richardson Kappa Delta Alumnae<\/a>.<\/p>\n

This group had long been supporters of children in need of help. Why, just two years ago they had been awarded Family Compass\u2019s North Star Award, and now Kappa Delta\u2019s Neva Cochran<\/strong> was being honored with the North Star Award.<\/p>\n

While the VIP-ers were being VIP-ed, other guests like Kathleen LaValle<\/strong>, Christie Carter<\/strong>, Candace Winslow<\/strong>, Becca Leonard<\/strong> and Sarah Losinger<\/strong> poured into the club\u2019s lobby right on cue for the celebration.<\/p>\n

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Sarah Losinger<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
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Becca Leonard<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
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Candace Winslow and Christie Carter<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Unlike other luncheons that prolong their fellowship chatting, NorthStar was lean and got straight to the day\u2019s program.<\/p>\n

Thanks to kicking off with a brief video, guests quickly took their places and table talk was silenced.<\/p>\n

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Helen Holman<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
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Neva Cochran and Ona Foster<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Immediately Co-Chairs Vanessa and Neda welcomed guests and introduced Honorary Chair Helen Holman. Well-known for her involvement in various aspects of fundraising, Helen extolled the importance of Family compass and acknowledged the leadership of Ona, who followed Helen to the podium to present the North Star Award to Neva.<\/p>\n

Then Ona spoke of the importance of listening to the inner voice and doing the right thing, using as an example past Christmas holidays when she and her brother dealt with her stepmother following the death of their father.<\/p>\n

In saluting her Family Compass staff, Ona reeled off the fact that in 2023, they managed to keep 717 children out of the child welfare system. With each case costing $831,000, Family Compass was able to \u201csave our community $596M last year.\u201d Regarding her staff, they \u201cserved 20% more children and parents in our program that the previous year. They also spent 32% more time with families because, make no mistake, families in our community are in crisis. I didn\u2019t ask them [the staff] to do it. They just did it because it needed to be done. We have more fathers, 23% of our client population are now dads, and so those children get to have fathers in their lives.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ona closed with two question for the audience,<\/p>\n

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  1. \u201cWho left a legacy for you?\u201d<\/li>\n
  2. \u201cWho are you leaving a legacy for?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    It then was time for a chat between Calvert Collins-Bratton<\/strong> and Antwone, with the following highlights:<\/p>\n

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    Antwone Fisher and Calvert Collins-Bratton<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
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    • Born in prison to his 17-year-old mother, who was herself a foster child. Since his father had been murdered two months before his birth, Antwone was put in an orphanage. He was placed with a woman named Miss Nellie Strange. Social services felt she was holding him too closely and they were bonding, so they placed him in a foster home where he had two other foster siblings who were sexually abused.<\/li>\n
    • His foster father was a preacher and they went to church almost three or four days a week. It was this time that his foster brother kept running away to be with his mother. Social services asked her to keep him while he was at school. He was at her apartment about a week before he told the teacher that he was by himself. \u201cAnd from that, he had his Odyssey.\u201d He ended up in the penitentiary. They still keep in contact because \u201cmy foster siblings are the ones that I feel like are my siblings. So when my actual siblings call me, I don\u2019t pick up. I wait to see what the message is.\u201d<\/li>\n
    • However, when his foster brother \u201ccalls, I feel like I know he was an angel. We\u2019re doing a lot together. He was an angel. Like my mother, some people are just not able to make good choices. And no matter how hard you try to show them how to do work, or that it\u2019s best to suffer a little bit to get to a better place, they just don\u2019t want to hear it.\u201d<\/li>\n
    • Antwone\u2019s foster father \u2014 \u201cHe had his favorites and I was lucky enough to be favored. So, he wasn\u2019t abusive toward me, but it was my brother. And it hurt my feelings, because I would see that. And that was one thing we didn\u2019t share. And I felt almost guilty.\u201d<\/li>\n
    • Forgiveness \u2014 One day when talking to his wife, he described his foster parents as being industrious despite being older, uneducated, from the rural south. They considered that it was good business strategy to have foster kids. His wife was surprised to hear the good things. \u201cI thought to myself, \u2018Wow! you know, maybe I\u2019ve forgiven them\u2026 You don\u2019t want to live your life holding on to things\u2026. But my first thought was that he was just from another time. Actually, his grandfather, who raised him, was a slave. So, they didn\u2019t have a lot of experience, again, as a family.\u201d<\/li>\n
    • Social worker \u2014 When his social worker came to the house for visits, he didn\u2019t tell her what had been going on. Why? He didn\u2019t want to be a snitch and \u201cShe just never asked [how he felt].\u201d Disappointed, he would go to the playground whenever he saw her car parked in the driveway and \u201cstay an hour or so, whenever she gets paid. I just learned to keep it all to myself.\u201d<\/li>\n
    • Breakthrough \u2014 He went to several therapists as a youngster that helped. \u201cI think I probably would not have gotten to a place where I am, if I hadn\u2019t eventually opened up to talk to people about how I feel.<\/li>\n
    • Insecurity \u2014 Despite things getting a bit better and his ability to manipulate his foster parents, he was always on guard. When he was 12 or 14, he sensed his foster mother was \u201cin a mood.\u201d When he returned from school, she told him that she wanted him \u201cto go back.\u201d She had threatened him before but it wasn\u2019t until he heard her on the phone telling everyone that she was \u201cgonna send me back.\u201d The next\u00a0 morning when he was preparing to go to school, she asked, \u201cDo you have your things? and she gave him back to them [social welfare].<\/li>\n
    • Number of social workers \u2014 From the time he was born until he was 14, he had 13 social workers. After being put back into an orphanage, he aged out and was put into reform school.<\/li>\n
    • Good people \u2014 He had a teacher, Miss Prophet, for the fourth, fifth and sixth grades. He found school to be a respite from his home life. \u201cI\u2019d be the first kid on the playground in the morning waiting for school to open just because of that.\u201d<\/li>\n
    • On his own \u2014 Just a couple of months before turning 18, he was released from the reform school and returned to Cleveland to find a job and be on his own. There were a lot of kids that he had known in the foster program and reform school that were in similar conditions that June. \u201cAnd all the hustlers, pimps and drugs dealers knew that at a number of foster kids would be on the street. We were just like Oliver Twist. \u201c<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
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      Antwone Fisher and Calvert Collins-Bratton<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
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      • The Navy \u2014 Two days before Christmas of that year he was walking down the street and saw a sign reading \u201cJoin the Navy and see the world.\u201d It sounded like a good idea. When he went to sign up, the recruiting officer said, \u201cWe\u2019ll come back after the holidays because we\u2019re leaving for the holidays.\u201d Antwone said, \u201cIf you don\u2019t take me now, I\u2019ll join the Army.\u201d He didn\u2019t really want to join the Army because of the Army\u2019s aptitude test and the fact that he was dyslexic. After they learned of his story, they got him a room at a Holiday Inn, since he hadn\u2019t had a bath or a shower or slept in a bed in two or three months. The next morning before dawn there was a sailor at the door to take him for testing, and that night he was in Great Lakes, Illinois, and boot camp. He kept saying to himself, \u201cI gotta do this for me.\u201d As bad as boot camp was, he kept reminding himself that he had been homeless. He spent the next 11 years in the Navy on six different ships and living in Japan for four years and traveling everywhere.<\/li>\n
      • Lt. Col. Williams \u2014 The anger issues that still haunted him were addressed by the Navy\u2019s Lt. Col. Williams by first making him read a book, so they could discuss it. Antwone told him that he had a difficult time reading. An evaluation resulted in his being diagnosed dyslexic. While most people may be disappointed with such news, Antwone was \u201cso happy.\u201d He was given \u201cThe Greatest\u201d about Muhammad Ali<\/strong> and \u201cdiscovered about reading was that you can actually feel like you\u2019re in the story.\u201d<\/li>\n
      • The road to recovery \u2014 Williams forced Antwone to find his birth parents\u2019 families because Antwone thought he had \u201ccome from nowhere, but everybody comes from somewhere. And one day you should find out where it is.\u201d Antwone had created family out of the people he had met. One of those people had been Miss Prophet, whom he had lost touch with after being homeless. Luckily, Antwone\u2019s wife located her. In celebrating and reconnecting with Miss Prophet, some of the social workers, his friends and teachers from his youth, he threw a party in Cleveland. When asked why he was having the party, his answer was \u201cWell, you guys are family.\u201d<\/li>\n
      • Discovering family \u2014 In finding his relatives, he discovered that he had gone to elementary school with his cousin. His father\u2019s brother had lived two streets away. And within \u201cwalking distance, there was the house where my father lived and died. I mean, the apartment. I\u00a0 walked passed that apartment everyday on my way to high school.\u201d<\/li>\n
      • Becoming a screenwriter \u2014 Initially he tried his hand at creating a better life for himself, but the only story he had was his own life. While working at a film studio, he was told he should hire a screenwriter, but he took it upon himself to do it. A young producer [Dallas native son Todd Black<\/strong>] offered to read some of his first pages. Three weeks later, the producer contacted him and said he needed to quit his job and learn how to write a screenplay.\u00a0 He would not only pay Antwone, but offered him an office on the 20th Century Fox lot.<\/li>\n
      • Denzel Washington<\/strong> \u2014 Todd sent the finished script to Denzel Washington\u2019s agent. Both Will Smith<\/strong> and Laurence Fishburne<\/strong> were considered to play Antwone.\u00a0 As it turned out, Denzel not only wanted to play Col. Lt. Williams, he wanted to make his directorial debut.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

        And once again, thanks to a tightly run program, guests were headed back to work and responsibilities before 1 p.m.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n